Rely on the Meaning, Not on the Words

Whether a person has a self or is without self cannot be judged simply by whether the word "I" appears in their speech with others, because the Buddha also used the word "I" when speaking with people and expounding the Dharma—it is unavoidable, otherwise there would be no way to express one's thoughts and views clearly. When the Buddha spoke, he also said things like "I did such and such," yet the Buddha's mind was without self. Some people, though their speech does not contain the word "I," are full of self between the lines—the flavor of self is very strong.

One must observe and analyze whether the word "I" in their written and spoken language is an objective noun or concept, or whether it contains a very real and substantial self, such that there is grasping and attachment, extreme protectiveness, or an abundance of subjective emotions like pride, self-congratulation, or inferiority.

By relying on the meaning rather than on the words, and savoring the true meaning and true direction of each person's language, one can judge whether there is a self in that person's mind, and whether the flavor of self is light or heavy. To judge whether a person has eliminated the view of self, do not rely on the surface meaning of their verbal narration—what they point you to may not be real. You must carefully discern the tone and flavor of their words, and observe whether what they do is consistent with what they say, or is far-fetched. This can be faked, but the disguise cannot last long; sooner or later the truth will show through.